• About this, that and the next thing

The Ox

~ Short stories, real ales and fine finger food

The Ox

Tag Archives: SF

No-one laughed at the monkeys

15 Tuesday Mar 2016

Posted by patblack in Film, Movies, Reviews, science fiction, Writing

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

2001, A Space Odyssey, Arthur C Clarke, Bradford, Cinema, Hal 9000, Movies, National Media Museum, sci-fi, science fiction, SF, Stanley Kubrick

IMG_2853

A review I wrote for a screening of 2001: A Space Odyssey at the National Media Museum, Bradford, on December 30th 2014. 

Rock Hudson famously strode up and down the aisles at the 1968 premiere of 2001, demanding to know what the hell it was all about.

Going by some mutterings I heard at this re-release, his ghost may have been present to air old grievances.

Poor old Rock – the man who kissed Doris Day dozens of times without once wanting to – didn’t realise we’re not meant to know what it’s all about. There’s no clue as to what the black obelisks are. They just are.

My first exposure to Stanley Kubrick’s sci-fi masterpiece was on a 10in portable television in 1996… the National Media Museum in Bradford’s wide open spaces were a new dimension in comparison.

The special effects held up so beautifully on the big screen that I began to entertain conspiracy theories that would earn you a fat lip off Buzz Aldrin. Hal 9000’s unplugging was still tragic; you want Keir Dullea’s Bowman to let the fella sing a bit longer.

As an aside, I wonder if Kubrick ever realised that 2001’s hero shares the same first name as the famously tough-tackling Dundee United footballer of the 1980s and 90s. I have wondered at the possibilities of this Dave Bowman unlocking the secrets of time, space and existence in a tangerine and black spacesuit. Perhaps his version of Hal 9000 would have the voice of Archie MacPherson.

As Bowman zoomed through the stargate, I considered whether Kubrick and Arthur C Clarke took a trip of their own in conceiving this movie. The multi-dimensional Ikea suite at journey’s end jarred, though; there’s something about the green velvety chesterfield headboard on the bed that gets on my nerves. Knowing Kubrick, that colour, that material and that shape would have been painstakingly chosen and realised.

But so what? Bowman’s journey might have been better concluded with a confrontation with an emperor with no clothes on. Played by Kubrick.

But let’s not get sucked into Rock Hudson’s orbit.

The star child wrung a tear from this most jaded of viewers, a sublime moment at the end of the year when my first child was born.

This peerless cinematic epiphany was 24 hours before new year’s eve, a time when you could throw a bottle in the air, only for it to land in the hands of a man wearing a monkey onesie.

We’re no nearer an answer to the riddle of existence than our flea-bitten ancestors. That, I suspect, was Kubrick’s great cosmic joke.

As for the screening, the Rock Hudsonites in the audience were in the minority. No-one laughed at the monkeys. A lot of the people in the auditorium were very young, and there for the same reason I was. 2001’s legacy is secure.

You can read my science fiction stories, Sail The Starry Skies, if you like. There’s really no need to do this Dave. I’m feeling much better now. 

Life, the universe and… Oxford comma?

14 Monday Mar 2016

Posted by patblack in Authors, Books, Fiction, Flash fiction, Pat Black, science fiction, Short Stories, Short Story, Writing

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Aliens, Alternate realities, Cosmos, Dystopian, Flying Saucers, Laser guns, Life Jim But Not As We Know It, Life The Universe and Everything, Ray guns, science fiction, SciFi, SF, Short stories, short story, Spaceships, Starships, The Final Frontier, UFOs

20150930_162308

Get yer sci-fi… ‘Errr yer sci-fi…

Tales of mystery, the adventure, and the unknown… the cosmos… alternative realities, dystopian visions… yes, a few rayguns… a super-long-distance relationship… what to do if the Aliens Are Coming… and many more.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Sail-Starry-Skies-Science-fiction-ebook/dp/B01C438M00/

For US readers:

http://www.amazon.com/Sail-Starry-Skies-Science-fiction-ebook/dp/B01C438M00/

If IT Were THEE

05 Tuesday Aug 2014

Posted by patblack in Books, Flash fiction, Literature, Short Stories, Writing

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

AI, artificial intelligence, computers, flash fiction, humans, humans from Earth, IT, literature, robots, sci-fi, science fiction, SF, Short stories

52FF by Marc Nash

52FF by Marc Nash

Here’s our next story, “If IT Were THEE”, beginning a run of four flash fictions from Marc Nash. 

The story is taken from Marc’s flash fiction collection, 52FF. You can buy it here (UK version), or here (US version).

You can read an interview with Marc here.

If IT Were THEE

By Marc Nash

Though IT too had ball and socket joints, the Borg could not sit down to face ITs inquisitor. While IT felt the cleanliness imperative to sweep up the fallen embers from under the ashtray’s lip, there was no concomitant compunction to issue any molecular mutation warning towards this human interlocutor. This was not a human IT had ever served before.

“So, tell me how it went down again.”

“Again’? Had ITs human master performed such a parabola before?

“The human THEE was assigned to serve, fell over the balcony’s balustrade. THEE was not witness to this circumstance.”

“See I don’t buy that, not for one moment.”

Borg’s speech recognition bundle ran over the audio input and automatically shunted over into the acronyms subfile; however the probability matrix rejected all prompts for ‘C.I.’ On a parallel track, the language synchromesh was filtering usage for the word ‘buy’ – credits, debits, transaction, merchandise, produce, all flash across ITs neural net, but none seem to correspond syntactically. Humans knew that the language applications bequeathed Borgs, worked on permutation and frequency analysis. Idiosyncratic speech such as that demonstrated by ITs current interviewer, left IT with no possible clear response. Only the twinkling of ITs facial panel’s LED displays would indicate to ITs inspector that some measure of logical processing was taking place.

“Alright, let me try and make this easier for you. How did your sensors not detect the human there on the balcony while you were going about your duties?”

“THEE’s focus was precisely directed on the tasks THEE’s armatures were performing. Scanning at floor level as THEE cleaned it to spick and span gold standard.”

“You know, I might believe that of a fellow human being. Restricted by a visual cortex comprised of wandering rods and cones, mounted on pivoting stalks so that we have to tilt up or down but not both simultaneously. Yet you my fine piece of cybernetic engineering, you aren’t so constrained. No blind spots for you, since you cast a sensory mesh over entire areas and scan the lot at over 400 frames a second. There’s no way the human’s volumetric image would not have shown up in your scan. Unless there was a fault in your systems. But we’ve run full diagnostics. Your visual apparatus is functioning normally. Blind spots simply ain’t conceivable.”

Why was ITs interrogator telling IT this? IT had run ITs own diagnostics as matter of routine and pre-established fully operational visuals.

“Point of clarification please. Does the human mean for THEE to understand that he is using ‘blind’ as an associative idea?”

 “Come on Borg, you can do better than that! We haven’t programmed any language chip for literalism in well over a generation. You tipped him over the edge Borg and here I most definitely do mean literally not figuratively.”

‘Tipping’- a pecuniary reward given for good service … The Borg always renders good service.

“THEE was executing THEE’s roster of devoirs when THEE-“

“Yeah, ‘executing’. That’s a good word for it. Did you imagine it would liberate you from the chore of your duties?”

‘Tchaw’, no word match found. ‘Chaw’, no word match found. ‘Chore’, no word match found. Nearest match ‘Jaw’, discounted by syntactical context.

“THEE cannot imagine anything. THEE is fibre optics and silicon chips mounted on a motherboard. THEE is completely programmed.”

“The crawlspaces in between Borg. The neural network we spawn but allow to develop of its own accord. The room our designers give Borgs for reflexivity. To better predict our wants and needs. The leeway we accord you to form independence of thought, even though we’ve erected bulwarks aplenty against you finding any identity. And right now, you’re hiding facts in that space.”

‘Space’… space, has myriad of meanings. Context too wide, contains all meanings. Infinity itself. Expanding universes.

‘Reflexivity’ – mirrors. ITs topological visual synchromesh means silvered glass does not function for IT, but humans can view their own image.

“THEE’s master had a tube mounted on a fulcrum on the balcony. Initially THEE analysed it as an armature, one like THEE’s own welding arm. Maybe mounted awaiting repair or charging. But the armature always lay unattended during daylight hours. At night however, THEE witnessed THEE’s master bend down and press his face into the descending end of the tube. Over time THEE refined THEE’s observation to the fact that he was only pressing one eye into the tube. THEE could not apprehend for what function. THEE engaged him in inquiry as to whether please master wished THEE to clean or mend the armature in any way. Master declined THEE’s request, instructing that THEE never need concern THEE  with what THEE is informed is called a ‘telescope’.”

‘Telescope’, no word match found. ‘Scope’- range, breadth, space, opportunity. ‘Television’ – multi-dimensional human entertainment screen requiring of regular cleaning and dusting regimen, but not when illuminated.

“THEE needed to witness what master was witnessing. The tube’s ascending arm pointed at the sky. With the dim twinkling lights therein. THEE needed to know what among the black therein held master’s attention for hours at a time. No, not need, want. Master restates that THEE never need concern THEE with telescope. With range, breadth, space, opportunity. THEE, he, concept of need, cannot align two vocabularies. Need. Master’s needs. THEE is to serve needs at all times. Master parabolates over balcony. THEE struggles to bend ball and socket joints to have visual sensors abut descending end of the tube.”

“Good God in heaven!”

‘Heaven’, no match found. ‘God’- irrelevancy, arcane value, passover.

“And what did you see in that tube Borg?”

“Nothing. Blackness, but different hue to the sky. No twinkling lights. Just chromatographic absence in topographical shape of the end of the tube.”

“Still can’t see yourselves in mirrors huh? Got some way to go yet before you pose any systematic threat. Thank you Borg. That will be all from you. For eternity.”

‘Eternity’, no match found. ‘Et’, no match found. ‘Earn’ – merit, deserve, gain from service. ‘Ity’ – suffix expressing condition or state.

“Thank you human master.”

Copyright (c) Marc Nash 2014

You can read the next story, “The Fetish Garden”, here.

Recent Posts

  • My Boris Johnson fantasy
  • Interview: Matthew Harffy
  • Interview: Ger Hogan
  • The Family – the thriller of the year, out now!
  • Interview: Lisa Hobman

Archives

  • December 2019
  • August 2019
  • May 2019
  • April 2019
  • March 2019
  • December 2018
  • August 2017
  • July 2016
  • June 2016
  • May 2016
  • April 2016
  • March 2016
  • February 2016
  • January 2016
  • December 2015
  • October 2015
  • September 2015
  • March 2015
  • November 2014
  • October 2014
  • September 2014
  • August 2014
  • July 2014
  • May 2012

Categories

  • 365
  • Alcohol
  • Authors
  • Books
  • Chick-Lit
  • Christmas
  • Crime
  • Crime fiction
  • Debut novel
  • Drama
  • Drink
  • Drinking
  • Essays
  • Fiction
  • Film
  • Flash fiction
  • Food
  • Food and Drink
  • Halloween
  • Historical fiction
  • Horror
  • Interview
  • Iron Maiden
  • Jaws
  • Journalists
  • Licensed Trade
  • Literature
  • Locked room mystery
  • Media
  • Memoir
  • Movies
  • Music
  • Mystery
  • Noir
  • Non-fiction
  • Novels
  • Pat Black
  • Politics
  • Pop culture
  • Post-apocalyptic
  • Pubs
  • Reviews
  • science fiction
  • Short Stories
  • Short Story
  • Spoken Word
  • Sport
  • Suckerpunch
  • This Thing You Humans Call Love
  • Uncategorized
  • Werewolves
  • Writing
  • Zombies

Meta

  • Register
  • Log in
  • Entries feed
  • Comments feed
  • WordPress.com

Blog at WordPress.com.

Cancel
Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy